If the thought of an office party makes you anxious, know this: you’re not alone.
Social anxiety, or the fear of communicating with the outside world, is incredibly common. As psychologist Christian Jarrett points out, it’s natural for civilized individuals to worry about things like reputation and status. Plus, we simply fear looking foolish.
When preparing for a corporate event, try to view it not as a threat, but as an opportunity to forge closer connections, bond, and have fun together. It’s also helpful to recall specific instances—no matter how rare—when past corporate events left a positive mark on your life, when you had a great time, or made new friends.
One of the most effective ways to reduce social anxiety is to be strategically proactive. If there are colleagues you’d like to attend the party with, don’t wait for them to invite you. Take the initiative and invite them first. They’ll likely appreciate it. If small talk is challenging for you, prepare in advance. For instance, catch up on recent important events.
For those who don’t socialize much, it’s wise to come up with some clever phrases ahead of time that can help when the conversation hits a dead end.
If you find yourself feeling overlooked at the party, look for someone who seems even more left out. Then, ask them something neutral yet relatable, like their thoughts on holiday gifts.
Even better, seek out someone who appears to be in need of attention and become the person who brings them some positive vibes.
No one thinks poorly of you. In fact, most people aren’t thinking about you at all.
Some psychological research might bring you comfort, notes Christian Jarrett. A team of researchers from Washington University in St. Louis found that friends of socially anxious individuals often view their relationships more positively than the socially anxious individuals themselves do. In other words, your friends likely care about you more than you realize.
Another study revealed that socially anxious people mistakenly believe others are highly critical of their appearance. In reality, most people don’t pay much attention to you at all, as reported by BBC Science Focus.
Keep this in mind when you’re agonizing over what to wear or what to say. People are generally wrapped up in their own thoughts and don’t judge you as harshly as you might think.
Why go through all this trouble when you could just stay home? First, not every workplace will look kindly on that choice. Second, avoiding the “scary” situation only fuels the problem. You won’t solve it with alcohol or drugs. All the complex issues in our lives can only be eased through practice.